Blue Skies
by The Unplanner
Summary: A one-shot collection for anything you want to see from the Time Break AU of "Dark Clouds" or "Silver Linings!" Taking all suggestions!
1. Help Me, Professor Kokonoe!

**Blue Skies**

 _Preliminary Author's Notes: I have just been hit with inspiration, so I'm posting this before the end of Silver Linings._

 _"Blue Skies" is a collection of one-shots in the general universe of Dark Clouds and Silver Linings. If you have an awesome idea, but don't think you could write it yourself, tell me about it via reviews or PMs! We'll chat for a bit to add some clarity, and so you'll know what to expect when I place your idea here!_

 **Help Me, Professor Kokonoe!**

 _A/N: The lucky winner of the first one-shot in this collection is "That Mysterious Reader!" The premise is that Sora gets p-wn'd by Demyx in their encounter at Olympus Coliseum. So, let us Observe: one of the many possibilities...of the Continuum Shift._

The curtain rose on a darkened stage in a pop-up book. A spotlight shined down on center stage, illuminating Professor Kokonoe in all her pink, poofy, kitty-cat Mad Scientist glory. She begins to recite a prepared speech...

"Greetings, lost children. I am Professor Kokonoe, genius scientist and ruler of the Sector Seven laboratory. ...Well, OK, we aren't in the lab at the moment. This place can sort of be temporarily moved into the Boundary. Well, simply put, it's a mysterious room. A room where you can do anything you want. To be honest, it's a paradise for all those sad, little lost children who couldn't make it to the True Ending. A sort of Avalon. If you're one of those nutbars who's all 'I don't need help' or 'I only want to unlock hidden stuff' or 'I'll just look for a flowchart online,' then you can piss off... Very well. Lost child of the day, you may enter."

From stage right, a boy with absurdly spiky brown hair wanders in, his giant yellow clown shoes squeaking on the tiled floor. "Aw, come on! I only had twenty to go! Hey, isn't this normally the part where I'm floating on my back in a black space?"

"Wait a minute... Who the hell are you? I've never seen you before, kiddo."

"How do you _not_ know? I'm the main character! I've been all over the place! And who are you, anyway?"

"No. I am _not_ going to recite that whole speech twice an episode ever again. I'm Kokonoe. You come in, you get advice on how to get to the True Ending, you leave. So, since you're not going anywhere without following this process, I suggest you confess. What sort of obstacle stopped you from doing whatever it was you were trying to do?"

"Um... He didn't really offer a name. He was one of those freaks in Organization XIII, and he summoned a bunch of water things to fight me. I had to beat all 80 of them in one minute, and when I didn't... Well, here I am. Got any tips?"

"Organization What? Let me consult my notes... You're kidding me! Lambda, I'm going to upgrade you over this bullsnot! And who changed my swear word just now?"

"I hear there's a profanity filter in place, or something. Why would this 'Lambda' see getting an upgrade as a punishment?"

"You don't know me very well, kid. Anyway, Sora, you forgot your Reaction Commands when you were fighting."

A question mark appeared over Sora's head. "My what?"

"You know! You hit the enemy a few times, or block their attack, or something, and then you can press the Triangle Button and wreck them in one hit! Sounds overpowered, in my opinion. If I had something like that, I'd use it every chance I got! I should work on that next..." Kokonoe began scheming. "I'll call it Armament Infinity Version 0.8: Reaction Command..."

Sora was still confused. "...Is the Triangle Button one of those buttons on your doohickey?" He tried to get past Kokonoe and push random buttons, but was pushed back by the sheer force of the Professor's boundless rage.

" _DOOHICKEY?!_ This is a state of the art computer console capable of phenomena intervention and teleportation! It can run sixteen copies of Skyrim at once on the highest graphics settings, and still have RAM left over to browse fanfiction while they load! And you DARE call it a doohickey?"

"Sorry! I don't get computer stuff!"

"Who let you out of the cave without basic knowledge of computer use...?" Kokonoe fumed, but tried to rein herself in to get this idiot out of her show faster. "Ugh. You don't need to worry about the Triangle Button yourself. Trust me, the people who need to know are listening right now. So try not to make such a fool of yourself again!"

"So what should I do?"

"You whack one of the clones with your Keyblade once, then grab it and swing it around. It'll draw in the rest and be much faster than going after them one by one. For the benefit of the audience, that particular Reaction Command is called Wild Dance. Now, go on! GET!" Kokonoe pressed a button on her state of the art computer console, and a door opened offscreen. Sora wandered out, stage right.

Kokonoe growled in frustration. "I'm sick of this crab. And that profanity filter. I have way too many lost children to deal with as it is! Maybe I can contact someone else to deal with the Heart Timeline kids." She produced a walkie-talkie from the magic space behind anime characters' backs. "Yes, Mr. Sid? This is Professor Kokonoe of the Azure Timeline..."

The curtain fell.


	2. Help Me, Professor Kokonoe! AGAIN!

**Blue Skies**

 **Help Me, Professor Kokonoe!**

 **AGAIN?!**

 _A/N: That Mysterious Reader is on a roll! Someone else, please give me an idea before I have to dedicate the whole collection to this guy!_

 _I'm on a roll, too. This is the third upload today. Please give me a break for a few hours!_

 _This follows immediately after the last segment...sort of. You'll see._

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"...Hello, Mr. Sid? This is Professor Kokonoe from the Azure Timeline. I have something to tell you." Kokonoe spoke into her walkie-talkie.

The speaker squawked the voice of the man on the other end. "That's _Master_ Yen Sid. You'd better have a good reason to be calling me long distance. This crystal runs up fees, you know, and I have to pay out of my retirement fund."

"You have to pay fees on a magical communicator crystal? Well, there goes the last reason I could think of to use magic. Anyway, your timeline has been dumping your Bad Ends onto my show. So I'm redirecting all your lost children back to you. You can call it, Help Me! Master Yen Sid!"

"What!? I refuse! I am _trying_ to live out my retirement, and I will not stand for your conspiracies to force me back into the field!"

"Well, too bad, old man. I just got an email from the Author himself. It reads, and I quote: RE: Help Me! Master Yen Sid!: Great idea! Implement it as soon as possible!" Kokonoe read off her console's screen.

"Did you really, now? Show me proof!"

In the Mysterious Tower, Yen Sid's hat jumped off his head and hovered over the candle he made out of a human skull on his desk. The candle's flame sprang to life, and began to lick upward towards Yen Sid's pointy treasure.

Yen Sid was horrified by this display, which exemplified the power of artistic license. "No, stop! I understand! I need that hat!"

Fine.

Yen Sid's hat returned to his head, and the candle went out. "That was too close... I hope Kokonoe receives some sort of comeuppance for this."

Oh, she will.

 **Help Me! Professor Kokonoe!**

Kokonoe's head shot towards the door as the intro splash covered the stage. "What? Already? Fine. This better be one of my own lost children..."

The curtain rose, the spotlight shone down...blah, blah, blah...

"Welcome, lost children. I am Professor Kokonoe, genius scientist and ruler of the Sector Seven laboratory. ...Well, OK, we aren't in the lab at the moment. This place can be sort of momentarily moved into the Boundary. Well, simply put, it's a mysterious room. A room where you can do anything you want. To be honest, it's a paradise for all those sad, little lost children who couldn't make it to the True Ending. A sort of Avalon. If you're one of those nutbars who's all, 'I don't need help' or 'I only want to unlock hidden stuff' or 'I'll just look for a flowchart online,' then you can piss off... Very well. Lost child of the day, you may enter."

Lambda-11 hovered in from the stage right. Kokonoe growled. "Lambda? I already did your episode!"

"You did _your_ Lambda's episode," Lambda responded.

"Well, the fact you can talk back means you actually aren't my Lambda, so I guess we've got to do this whole song and dance again. And why did the Author gloss over the room description when I have to say every word of that intro nobody listens to?"

"Well, at least I already know what's supposed to happen here. You give me advice so I can try again and go for the True Ending, right?"

"Right! FINALLY someone gets it right the first time! I always knew you had promise, Lambda. But I'm still going to punish you for the last guy to come in here."

"Why me? Who came in last?"

"Some bumpkin named Sora. He said he messed up fighting Demyx's gimmick battle, though not in those exact words."

"But... that hasn't even happened yet! It won't happen for at least four chapters, maybe more!"

"Lambda, you described it yourself. What is time like here in the Boundary?"

"...A ball of wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey stuff?" Lambda had to finally open her Wonderland memory quarantine to access that information, and the headache told her that this was only going to go downhill.

"Exactly. So it doesn't matter if it happened yet out there. It happened in here, and _you_ are getting _upgrades_ for it." Kokonoe pulled a massive, double-headed wrench out of her magic anime pocket, mentally raging for the umpteenth time that Litchi could have this plot device in the front and the Professor couldn't.

Just in case that mental image already scarred any readers for life, the scene faded to black.

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When the lights came back on, Lambda's legs were replaced with tank treads, and Kokonoe had even cut Lambda's lengthy ponytail off...so it wouldn't drag on the ground from her shorter height, of course. Feel free to picture any other "upgrades" you would have liked to see Kokonoe install, because she totally could have done them.

"Why did you do this to me? It's not really an upgrade if I can't fly anymore. I can't even use stairs!"

"You should consider that part a blessing in disguise! Stairs are evil!"

"Claptrap seemed pretty distressed that he couldn't climb them."

"...When did you find any time to play other video games?"

"I didn't. Claptrap's talking on my communicator right now, and...Oh gods no! NO NO NONONO! NO DUBSTEP!"

The volume increased until it carried to Kokonoe's sensitive cat ears. "Wub wub wub wub wub DROP! Wub wub..."

"Yikes! I thought this was an isolated dimension! I'll cut that off right away!" Claptrap's horrible defilement of rhythm and melody faded into blessed silence. "Phew. Don't worry, once you get out of here, all the upgrades never happened. Now, what brought you here in the first place?"

"Well, Riku and I were fighting Roxas, and at the end... Well, I'll bring it up on screen." Lambda pointed at a large monitor on the far wall that had gone un-described up until this point. A video file played of one of the last scenes in Chapter 8 of Silver Linings, with one crucial difference.

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"What...?"

"Ansem!" Lambda launched a summoned sword from her spot on the ground, piercing Ansem's chest. As he bled out, he whispered in Riku's voice, "Lambda...I'm sorry."

"No... I... NOOOOOOO!"

 _One of the many possibilities...of the Continuum Shift._

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The screen cut to black. Kokonoe was silent for a long time, or a few seconds, depending on how fast you can read that sentence. Then, "You killed your boyfriend." 

"...Affirmative."

"Don't you go robo-talk on me! You need to learn this slot! And the Author needs to turn off the profanity filter one of these days! Anyway, Kokonoe's Love Clinic is now back in business, The Professor is in!"

"...Love Clinic?" 

"Duh. Anyway, this is a pretty simple concept. You love Riku, right?"

"Right...?" 

"Then you've got to see through his flaws. Right there, he looked like Ansem for a second, so you stabbed him without taking any time to look deeper or even verify what you were seeing. You looked like Nu back there; it was pathetic. Next time, ask questions first, _then_ shoot, if and only if he actually went to the Evil Side. Since the whole point of Dark Clouds was that the Evil Side and the Dark Side are not the same thing. Unless it's the Darkside with no space, in which case you stab first and ask questions later. Got that?"

"...Got it. I'll do better next time. Can I go now? My treads are aching."

"You may. Now get out there and bring home the silver-haired bacon. Make me lots of grand-units!"

"...No promises." Shuddering, Lambda rolled out and transformed...back to her old self, offscreen.

"Now maybe I can get some actual science done on that Reaction Command project..."

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 _The scene breaks in this story will be a line of bold B's...unless I forget. Keep sending in ideas! But give me a break once in a while, okay? Tell me if you'd like your fourth wall returned undamaged after the next humor piece, too, because I'm dangerously close to breaking the Fanfiction Author's Law of Conservation of Plot Points on the fourth wall here. Specifically, plot points and plot devices can be created but not destroyed, and if a story gets rid of any item, ability, or physics, the reasoning behind the changed material should be explained before the end of the story. Failure to uphold this tenet will invoke the Wrath of Trolls, and the author will fall into the Abyss of Lazy Writing. No exceptions._


	3. Help Me! Master Yen Sid!

**Blue Skies**

 _A/N: And here is a submission from my favorite brother, who goes by the name of FierceDeityMask! This time, it's the premier episode of Help Me! Master Yen Sid!_

 _I'd like everyone to know something: This doesn't have to be just a collection of humorous skits. If you've got an idea for something serious, or just different from the main plotline, I can post those here, too._

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 **Help Me! Master Yen Sid!**

The now-title character looked up from his musings as the intro splash covered the screen. "So, the first 'lost child' approaches? I had hoped it wouldn't be so soon... Wait, what is this paper?"

Read it.

"Ahem! Greetings, lost hearts. I am Master Yen Sid, acclaimed sorceror and ruler of the Mysterious Tower. True, we are not in the tower at the moment. This place can be temporarily moved into the Realm of Sleep. In this mysterious place, you may do whatever you wish, for this is a refuge for all the lonely, lost hearts who could not reach the True Ending. ...Very well. Lost heart of the day, you may enter."

Sora walked into the chamber through the side door, looking uncharacteristically depressed. "Huh? Who are you?"

"Hmm, yes. It does seem this is our first meeting. However, did you not hear a word of that ridiculous speech I was forced to give only moments ago, Sora?"

"Uh...um...Wait, this seems familiar..."

"You refer to events that have yet to pass. I am Master Yen Sid. Now, to speed you on your path toward the True Ending...and away from my meditation time...tell me. What brings you here?"

Sora scratched his head. "Well, I just made it to Hollow Bastion, chasing Riku. I caught up, and that's when he took the Keyblade from me. How _did_ he do that?"

"Every word he spoke was the truth, bitter as that truth is. Go on..."

"Well, he left me this wooden sword, and Donald and Goofy left me with the Beast. But I tried smacking Heartless around with the wooden sword, and they didn't die like they should have."

"Sora, that is a stick. It holds no special power to slay Heartless."

"Then what was I supposed to do? Run away?"

"No. You were merely supposed to believe in your friends."

"But Donald and Goofy left me behind! Riku stole my Keyblade...or his Keyblade, and left me with the stick!"

"True, very true. But they left you with one other, insurmountable advantage."

Question mark. "What?"

"The Beast, Sora. Trust in the Beast's power, for he can destroy any obstacle in your way. In all seriousness, had you held back and used defensive magic, the Beast would have sundered Defenders, activated gates, and crushed walls for you. My antagonist preaches her 'bullsnot' about the Black Beast from her timeline, but that monster is nothing compared to your friend. Try it again, and this time, remember. Your friends are your power!"

"Got it, Master!" Sora turned to leave, but Yen Sid slammed the door with a wave of his hand and a bit of magic.

"No, say it with me. _My friends are my power!_ "

"...My friends are my power?" Sora mumbled.

"Louder! Let the worlds hear your determination!"

"MY FRIENDS ARE MY POWER!" Sora bellowed.

"Much better. Be sure to use tell that to Riku when you reach him." Yen Sid waved his hand, and the door re-opened.

"Got it. And thanks for your help!" Sora ran out of the chamber, back to the last Save Point.

"...I despise raising my voice," Yen Sid coughed. "If this continues, I may have to contact Cid's Gummi Biz to send shipments of Panaceas for the Silenced ailment."

A pouch appeared on Yen Sid's desk. Inside was a note saying, "For your services. -The Author" and five thousand munny.

"I would appreciate the additional income more if the Author had worded it differently... What am I to you? Your gulch? Ah, now I see why the Professor so despises that profanity filter. I will need to plan Episode 2 so as to discourage the coming of Episode 3... but for now, I must order those Panacea. Hack cough cough..." The old Master turned to his communication crystal. "Cid? I have need of your assistance..."

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 _A/N: I think I could have done more for the humor here. The episode that would have followed this one was removed; my brother didn't like it one bit, since he was made the avatar of all stupid fanboys. It might have also violated the Terms of Use to put another author's penname in the story, but if it did, it was far from the worst offender I've seen. Still, I'd rather make him happy than keep him angry at me, so I deleted the chapter.  
_


	4. The Next Generation

**Blue Skies**

 **The Next Generation**

 _A/N: I've got to slow down these updates someday, but today is not that day._

 _This scene/montage/sequence is made in a different vein from the pop-up skits of the past submissions. That Mysterious Reader and I had a chat to flesh out what I'm going to do about Kokonoe getting "grand-units" through Lambda. Long story short: she gets 'em._

 _I'm going to have to do some massive speculation about the future plots of Kingdom Hearts and Blazblue to get this far into the future. Specifically, I'm going to BS the ending of Kingdom Hearts III. Assumptions are as follows:_

 _Safe Assumption #1) Xehanort is defeated, and fails to restructure the World._

 _Risky Assumption #2) Sora opens the Door to Light, but does not restructure the World either. The Realm of Darkness continues to exist._

 _Might Not Be Assumption #3) The mess with the Time Break was resolved in KH2, resulting in only one stable portal that needs to be opened on both ends to permit people to pass back and forth, but allows communication. I don't know if that's how I'll handle it in Silver Linings, but it's possible._

 _Foolish Assumption #4) BlazBlue: Centralfiction does not end in the destruction of the world. Kokonoe continues doing science because_ science.

 _With that out of the way, let's start with the beginning..._

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Kokonoe's buzzer rang unexpectedly. Sure, she had one, but it wasn't connected to public channels, and she only had it for emergencies. Why have a secret lab if you were going to let telemarketers bug you?

She checked the Caller ID, and immediately hit the button to answer. "I didn't expect to hear from you again, Lambda. Did some new crisis come up?"

"You could say that," Lambda's voice came over the speaker. "We beat Xehanort, the worlds are at peace, et cetera. And I married Riku."

"Wow, you actually pulled it off! Good for you! What's the crisis, though?"

The line fell silent for a few seconds, then Lambda spoke up again. "Well, it's... I have a kid on the way."

Kokonoe was stunned. "Wait, what? Is that even possible?"

"Well, we had just gone through a _lot_ of nasty stuff Xehanort shoved at us, and we were glad to get through, and one thing led to another... At any rate, I can't think of any other way to explain the loading bar and countdown timer that showed up last night."

"A loading bar? My own Mother would probably roast something if she knew. Anyway, when's the kid due? Can you tell if it's a boy or girl, or some kind of non-gendered species?"

"3 months, 10 days, 5 hours, and 32 minutes. That's a little fast, isn't it?"

"Yeah, that's almost three times faster than a normal woman's. So what do you know about the baby?"

"Um...Okay, I have a lot of diagnostics here. He's a boy, and he's a hybrid between human, Dream Eater, and Prime Field Device. He's healthy. The 'Name' field is blank."

"Wait, what's that second species? And most mothers would kill to have what you've got. Most people have to make a wild guess, or use advanced magic or science to run tests."

"Well, I _am_ pretty lucky. Anyway, you missed the part in the Realm of Sleep, right? Riku turned into a Dream Eater during that debacle; it's the variety of Darkness-based monster that shows up in dreams. They come in two wider categories and a few dozen varieties of each. Riku was in the Spirit category, which only consumes the other ones, which are dangerous Nightmares. It's all only important anymore because my kid is part Spirit now. Did you catch all that?"

"I got notes. What did you expect? Anyway, I imagine when he's born, he'll be in a category of his own in terms of power right off the bat. You'll need to teach him how to use that power right, so he doesn't end up breaking things. The wrong things, anyway. Want suggestions for names?"

"Um, I guess. Would this make you his grandmother?"

"Ha ha ha! You really pulled through on those grand-units, Lambda! As for names, how about Omicron? No number, and if I were you, I'd skip 'Xi' for several reasons, like the facts that it's a girl's name and hard to pronounce."

"That name's perfect! I guess I'd better break the news to Riku when he wakes up. And when did I promise you grand-units?"

"Um...you didn't, really. Never mind. Call back anytime, Lambda!" Kokonoe hung up, and smirked. "Me, a grandma... Who would've thought?"

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"Congratulations, it's a boy! What will you name him?" The nurse at Destiny Islands Hospital (which wasn't a very big establishment, given the low population in that world) held up a healthy baby boy with Riku's blue-green eyes. He looked like an ordinary infant in most respects, though his legs were silver and metallic from the knees down, like armored boots. It was a good thing the people of the Destiny Islands had all grown to accept Lambda's own unique traits a while back. The nurse efficiently toweled him off, and handed him to Lambda on the hospital bed.

"We'll name him Omicron. Hello, Omicron. You've made your mother and father very happy today!" Lambda held the baby up over her head, and he giggled.

"I hope he grows up strong, but that's practically guaranteed." Riku rubbed Omicron's head. "I hope we can keep this little guy out of the pantry."

Lambda laughed. "If we can keep omniscient egomaniacs out of Kingdom Hearts, we can keep our baby boy out of the pantry. Am I cleared to go home?"

"Normally, you'd have to wait a day or two, but the birth was almost supernaturally smooth going. You can go, just let me get a wheelchair."

"I just turned off the pain. And I can fly! I don't need a wheelchair!"

"Just roll with it, Lambda." Lambda smacked Riku on the arm. "Sorry! No pun intended!"

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Omicron got to the toddler stage in a month, and did indeed try to get into every nook and cranny in the house. He never got anywhere near the knives or dish soap on Lambda's watch, though. As for Riku, he showed little Omicron _why_ he should steer clear of the knives, and let him poke one just to make sure he wouldn't swing pointy things around for no reason.

At age three, Omicron was coordinated enough to start practicing with wooden swords, his short blond hair shining in the summer sun as he engaged in a play match in the street. Riku wouldn't have it any other way; this was Island tradition and a popular activity for playing with other kids, after all. It was also good practice for whenever a new crisis decided to pop up. Sora and Kairi might think they could just retire, but Riku knew that one day someone would follow in Xehanort's footsteps, just as Xehanort inherited the will of another. (Not to mention Master Yen Sid tried to retire, and look where that got him.) For now, though, little Omicron looked positively adorable fending off three of the neighbors' kids at once with a spin attack. That was Riku's kid, through and through.

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When Omicron was four years old, his Mom and Dad went away one day and left him in the care of Selphie and her twenty-five cats. Selphie always said, "It's not quite a hundred and one Dalmatians, but I'm working on it!"

"Aunt Selphie" had already gotten Omicron to promise to track the kitties down if they ended up in treasure chests scattered all over the worlds, but the boy didn't think she was serious.

"But when is Mom coming back?"

"I said, she'll get back when she gets back. She'll have a surprise for you, too!"

"A surprise? What is it?"

"If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise, now would it? Now quiet down and eat your fish. Or I'll feed your dessert to Button." Omicron got the hint, and Button meowed pitifully when she only got her own share.

"Selphie, we're back! How's Cron doing?" Lambda referred to him with the nickname she'd come up with.

"He missed you, but I got him to eat. C'mon, Cron, your mom's waiting for you!"

And there she was at the front door. Omicron recognized her long braid with the large blade on the end, her warm red eyes, and her tendency to go barefoot and float partway off the ground everywhere, something the boy wished he could do himself.

Omicron did not recognize the two baby girls with identical silver hair and big gray-blue eyes in Lambda's arms. "Omicron, meet your twin little sisters, Pi and Rho! I want you three to get along, you hear?"

"I have little sisters? Is that why you were gone today?"

"It's true. I hope you can be a good friend and a good brother to them, since we'll all be living together for so long you'll forget you were ever the only kid in the house! Come on, your father has a neat trick he wants to show you for beating people after they knock you down! Thanks for looking after him, Selphie! I wish I could get him to eat as often as you do."

"I keep telling you to get a cat, Lambda. Or two or ten."

"Sure. Maybe one of these two will want one."

Omicron was deeply opposed to the idea. "But, Mom! A kitty will try to climb all over me! And they never leave the computer alone when Aunt Selphie brings them over..."

Lambda laughed as Omicron continued the debate all the way down the street. Selphie made a mental note to get the twins on board with Operation: Kitty Box Rescue.

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It turned out Pi and Rho were identical twins, down to the last eyelash (and no one ever did figure out where their eye color came from), and they always wore their long, silver hair in matching styles (which they changed at least once every week). Lambda never had any trouble with calling the wrong name, though, since she could always tell which girl was which by the ID tags she set up in her HUD. Robots get all the most helpful toys.

Speaking of useful traits, the girls had silver "boots" like Omicron's, but while they were thinner, lighter, and somewhat flimsier, they also had hover pads on the soles. Omicron was so jealous that the twins could fly that he actually called Grandma Kokonoe by himself to ask about upgrades, which was nearly disastrous.

He ended up having to talk his grandma's enthusiastic suggestions down to relatively safe things like rocket skates and an experimental wrist node on his left arm for channeling magic. Lambda was practically hysterical when she got him back, but Riku deeply approved and got him started learning "Roxas-level skater skills" right away. Roxas himself was hired as a tutor in the areas of "killer hangtime" and "sick tricks," as Myde (formerly Demyx) called them. Roxas was most proficient with skateboards, but he adapted his lessons quickly. Ironically, he was a much better teacher than his old tutors from Organization XIII ever were. Omicron incorporated the skates into his fighting style, using a short gunblade to fight at mid-range while maintaining constant motion.

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As for the girls, it turned out that as twins, they had a sort of mental link between them that let them communicate silently (and shamelessly cheat on tests). They also learned that their names could be an additional pun when they met with a cool guy named Lea, who taught them the joys of burning things. "Fire is the coolest element. Got it memorized?" They quickly came up with a combo spell, which they called the "Pi-Rho Burst," that turned them into a swift, flaming tornado. They preferred to wield matching jaw-blades, a weapon type that became surprisingly popular after Xion was revived. When the twins first demonstrated the Pi-Rho Burst during a sort of heroes' reunion when they were eight, Lea deeply approved, Ventus thought the name of the attack was hilarious, and Lambda made them pay for the torched backyard out of their allowance for the rest of their lives. They kept their training in safe places after that, but didn't stop entirely. It was good that they kept practicing, though...

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One night, when Omicron was fourteen and Pi and Rho were both ten, what Riku, now 29 years old, had been silently waiting for finally came to pass. The Destiny Islands once again fell to Darkness, the old heroes were scattered to unknown reaches of the worlds, and the three siblings were cast adrift on a new adventure led by the Light of the Keyblade, one that separated the twins and almost brought Omicron down the path of Darkness. But that's a story for another time...

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 _A/N: Darn it, now I want to write that, too! This time, though, it'll have to wait. I'll have to finish Silver Linings before I even think about doing all that._

 _Yes, the next generation will be pretty young when destiny finds them. There's a larger age difference between Omicron and the Pi-Rho twins, too, and with them all being siblings, the story of Kingdom Hearts wouldn't play out even close to the same way it did last time (there would be no Sora/Kairi analogue, for starters). Granted, we got Frozen, so it's now okay to have family bonding be more important than romance in a Disney movie/game._

 _Hint/Spoiler: Chi (as in χ-Blade) is a Greek letter. It's still possible to try and forge the key to Kingdom Hearts, and Lambda might as well have called her kids the Bait Bunch, in hindsight._

 _If any of you want to write something for this universe, I'd love to see this._


	5. KINGDOMTHIRST!

**Blue Skies**

 _A/N: My brother was NOT happy with the last Help Me! Master Yen Sid! episode. As a result, I've tied the Master up in his clothes closet (after removing the garments with very special powers), and I'm posting this parody of an old YouTube sensation that FierceDeityMask liked a lot. This is slightly altered from the version I emailed to him._

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 **KINGDOMTHIRST!**

 _(To be yelled as loudly as possible in an echo chamber by at least two absurdly muscular, sweaty Keyblade Masters)_

 **HEY!** Do you want to feel **SO DISNEY?**

Try Kingdomthirst! Energy drinks for people who need **GRATUITOUS AMOUNTS OF SQUARE ENIX!**

With all new flavors like Unversed! Negative energy! It's like adding a skirt to **ANOTHER RIVAL CHARACTER!**

Sound the alarm! You're going to be **UNCOMFORTABLY DARK!**

What's that? You want Soda? How about **CODED** **!** Made with plot devices! **REAL PLOT DEVICES** **!**

 **SPELLS!** **AAAAAAH!** You'll be good at them!

It's an energy drink for Nobodies! **LARXENERGY** **!**

These aren't your uncle's puns! They're your Master's puns! **PUNAGA** **!**

 **LIGHT! DARKNESS! LIGHT! DARKNESS!** Musicals! Transformations! Disney villains! More forms than **YOUR GARMENTS HAVE ROOM FOR!**

You'll be so inspiring, Xemnas will be like "slooooow dooooown" and you'll be like "My friends are my power!" and stab him in the face with your **DUAL KEYBLADES!**

You'll have so much ADHD! ADHD! **AAAAAAH!** Just getting distracted **ALL THE TIME!**

Power rolling! Power exploring! Power fighting! Power crying! Power shrinking! Power jumping! Power killing Heartless! You'll kill so many Heartless! **1000 HEARTLESS** **!**

Give Unversed to your Heartless and make them good at **SPELLS** **!** Make your Heartless cast **ABNORMALLY FAST!**

They'll cast as fast as **DONALD** **!** People will see them casting and think they're **DONALD** **!** They'll casts as fast as **DONALD** against the actual **DONALD** and it'll be a tie and they'll get deported back to **DISNEY CASTLE!**

Hey! Go with a sure thing! Don't gamble on your friends!

 **MALEFICENT!**

Try Kingdomthirst! The energy drink that will make you **AAAAAAH!** **DISNEY** **!** **AAAAAAH!**

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 _A/N: I hope you forgive me, man._

 _For everyone else, you should know that I won't post any more submissions to this until I make progress on Silver Linings. I might still collect them, but expect a bit of a wait._


	6. I Am Something

**Blue Skies**

 **Chapter 6: I Am... Something!**

 _A/N: In addition to being a new oneshot for Blue Skies, and a quick peek at my plans for the very end of Silver Linings, this is also a call for people to start sending me their requests again. The hiatus has technically been over for a few chapters now._

 _Most Blue Skies oneshots don't fit on the main timeline, but this is a canon event, in terms of Silver Linings. It occurs during the last day of Roxas' imprisonment in Virtual Twilight Town, and explains where the Secret Ansem Reports went. Obviously DiZ kept the ones he wrote with him, since he penned most of them AFTER being tossed into the Realm of Darkness, and after that he was never captured or separated from his important tech (his Kingdom Hearts Encoder, for example) again._

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 _The Mansion: Computer Room..._

Lambda sat at DiZ's computer terminal. Supposedly, she was administrating the Twilight Town simulation and preventing Nobodies from breaking in while Riku and DiZ were inside, but the maintenance tasks took barely a fraction of her attention, and she quickly determined that none of this terminal's functions could block the Corridors of Darkness that the Nobodies used to intrude on the virtual town.

She had plenty of time to spend sitting at this computer, so she started by poking through DiZ's files for anything that might tell her more about the enigma. She found a folder labeled "Secret Ansem Reports," with thirteen small text files. Given the firewall and quarantine around this data, DiZ hadn't wanted anyone to see it, but Lambda was built to hack gods. In comparison to the literally divine security measures that Lambda was designed to hack through, DiZ's firewall was like a knee-high fence trying to keep out a flying superhero in a video game, only without the extra invisible walls holding Lambda in the "approved" area. Laughable, in other words. She downloaded all the files, devised a macro to let herself open their proprietary format, and stored them for later.

This whole process took only a few seconds, so Lambda still had several minutes before anything important would happen in the virtual town. In the meantime, she opened a text editor to make a personal dream of hers come true.

 _"I am the light of dawn. I am the sword of willpower. I am the key to my ideal future! With power forged of love, I will tear apart the books of prophecy and cast you out! I am Lambda, and you hold no power over me."_ Nah, too sappy.

Maybe she should take a "justice" spin? _"I am the new hope. I am the righter of wrongs! I am the sword of will! With the key of balance in hand shall I emerge from the Darkness of servitude and break the chains of fate! I am Lambda! I will no longer dance to your will!"_ Nah, not enough justice.

In case it wasn't obvious, Lambda was planning out what she might say if she ever got to take a Keyblade of her own to Relius Clover's face, using Hakumen's awesome battle chant as a starting point.

She knew that the best way to make Relius look dumb is if she trumped him with the power of free will. Again: _"I am the next age. I am the key to my bonds. I am the sword of willpower! With this new strength I shall cut my strings and prove the true worth of the heart! I am Lambda, and I will never hand our worlds to you!"_ Was this version a bit too long? Actually, that first one looked pretty much perfect. Too bad Lambda didn't have a Keyblade of her own to go enact that speech right at this moment, but when it came to destiny, who knew for sure? Nobody should, if Lambda had anything to say about it.

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 _EDIT: The unfortunate deletion of an earlier chapter has caused it to be impossible to review this chapter if you already reviewed "KINGDOMTHIRST!". This is because the "one review per chapter" rule of the site doesn't take edits into account, and this chapter is the new Chapter 6.  
_


	7. KHO Part 1: Link Start!

**Blue Skies**

 **Chapter 7: Kingdom Hearts Online Part 1: "Link Start!"**

 _A/N: This might or might not be a part of Silver Linings. If I come up with something more closely related to the main crossover to use instead, I will._

 _Summary: While Sora, Donald, and Goofy are doing their second sweep of the worlds to try and stop Organization XIII, Riku and Lambda take a separate path that leads them to ALfheim Online. Unfortunately, the Heartless have followed them to this newly-connected world, and it's up to my crack OTP to save the game. Takes place at the same time as the latter half of the Sword Art Online anime, but not necessarily at the same place._

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 _Twilight Town: Computer Room..._

Our heroes had nothing to do, and about a week of time to kill before Sora finished re-sweeping the various worlds for an entrance to Organization XIII's stronghold. Of course, Riku and Lambda already knew where that entrance was-in the Twilight Town simulation, of which only the relevant rooms were still maintained-but their efforts to clue Sora in with an obvious box of clues had failed, or at least had a delayed reaction. Donald even ate the Sea-Salt Ice Cream bar that was supposed to help them guess the password!

Riku suggested forming a Dark Corridor to a random world. The only certainty was that it would take them somewhere they'd never heard of. Lambda agreed; it wasn't time to meet Sora yet, and they had a better chance of not running into him by accident if they didn't retrace either party's steps at all.

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 _ALfheim Online: A forest clearing on the edge of Sylph territory..._

The Dark Corridor formed, and the pair of travelers stepped out. Almost immediately, Lambda could tell this world was different from the rest. She could practically see the computer code that generated their surroundings. And that wasn't all.

She nudged Riku's shoulder. "Riku, I think we're in a virtual reality game."

Riku's expression showed he had no clue what Lambda was talking about. "A what?"

"This whole world is part of a game running on a really powerful computer. People log in to 'ALfheim Online' from wherever the 'real' world is to experience a different world, since apparently human-sized fairies, swords, and magic are uncommon in their reality," Lambda explained.

Riku nodded. "Sounds cool! Does that mean there's some sort of heroic quest to complete that someone thought up?"

Lambda shrugged. "Sort of. A lot of people are supposed to log into this world at once, and they all have to form alliances and compete with each other to find the quests, monsters, and loot first. Then I guess more quests get added by whoever runs the game, and people can trade the loot around."

"How do you know all this?" Riku asked.

"Well, I..." Uh-oh. "I think the system just caught onto the data link I used to figure this out. It's trying to decide if I'm an information pixie...or a foreign object."

Riku hesitantly asked, "What happens to foreign objects?"

Lambda gulped. "They get deleted. I'm not sure if it can do that to us, but I'm not about to test it. I'd much rather be an 'information pixie', whatever that... Oh." Lambda suddenly began shining brightly, and when she was fully obscured, the glow started shrinking.

When the light show faded, Lambda was only about as tall as Riku's fist, though she still looked mostly the same. She still wore her black bodysuit and white cape, but her red eyes were somewhat larger than usual compared to her face, and she had translucent, white wings, like holograms. They were shaped like dragonfly wings, but curled on the ends like flower petals, and held her aloft at the level of Riku's chest despite having no apparent substance to them. Her whole body glowed faintly. "Huh. I guess this is what a pixie looks like," Lambda remarked in a relatively calm tone, partly because her capacity to worry about weirdness had been exceeded several worlds ago.

"Weird. Will anything like that happen to me?" Riku's expression was a mix of concern and alarm.

"No, the system thinks you're a player, though there's a few points that don't line up. Your race is apparently 'Spriggan,' but not only are we nowhere near Spriggan territory, your avatar hasn't changed at all. You don't have the customary black hair or wings, so it might be better to just not bother pretending to be a player _or_ a Spriggan."

Riku latched on to one part of that explanation. "Wait, players get wings?"

Lambda nodded and flew up to Riku's eye level (in Ansem's body). "Yes, sort of like these. Players can fly with them, but you don't need wings to fly, remember? Wait, you'd better test that."

Riku nodded and floated off the ground with the Power of Darkness. "Okay, that still works."

Lambda gave Riku an examining look. "The system's treating this like the normal flight mechanic, with the maximum skill level. If you try to fly for more than ten minutes, the game will try to make you fall." Lambda's expression became worried. "Remember, we're technically invading hackers, so if the game thinks we're breaking the rules, it'll try to delete your account and my role, and then what?"

"I'll try to keep a low profile, then," Riku reassured his girlfriend-turned-pixie. Lambda's worried expression didn't go away, though. "Hey, Lambda? What's wrong?"

"Nothing serious, it's just...forget it." Lambda waved off Riku's question.

Riku made to grab hold of Lambda, then realized that grabbing her shoulder wouldn't work the same when she was so tiny. "If you're unhappy, then it's serious to me. Please, could you tell me what's wrong?"

Lambda didn't miss Riku's aborted motion, which fed into the problem. "It's stupid, really. You said it was 'weird' when I turned into a pixie. Do I look weird?"

Riku was taken aback for a second. Normally, his girlfriend was more concerned with how well she could fight than how she appeared. Then again, in this form... No, the important thing was reassuring Lambda right now. "No, Lambda, you don't look weird. That form's actually pretty cute."

Lambda blinked. Did her hearing just glitch up? Riku was an awesome warrior of Darkness and all-around badass, who wore a black hood over the face he'd stolen from his arch-enemy just for the added intimidation factor more than any sort of stealth, but did _her_ Riku just say the word _cute?_ "Do you really mean it? I guess I might be cute. I can't really tell without a mirror." Lambda started leaning around to look herself over.

"Oh shoot, did I just say that out loud? There goes my tall, dark, mysterious image." Riku facepalmed, and Lambda giggled at him.

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. Anyway, I can live with being less than a foot tall for a while. I'll be pretty useless in combat, though..." Lambda tested out her strength by flexing her arms, then giggled more sheepishly when she realized how silly she must look.

Riku chuckled along with Lambda. "Good to hear you're back to normal. It's not like you to worry about how you look. But what's an information pixie supposed to do, then?"

Lambda blushed a little, making her look even cuter...though Riku would only say so over his dead body. "I was more worried about how _you_ think I look. Sure, I'm a sword-shooting death machine, but I have insecurities sometimes, like anyone else. Anyway, in this form, I have a wide-range map of the area, and access to the tutorial programs. I'd better run you through those. First off, raise your left index finger in front of you, and then swipe it downward."

Riku did as instructed, and a line of holographic circles formed a trail behind the motion. Lambda continued, "This is the main menu. Get used to that motion, because practically everything in this world relies on it. For right now, touch this button here..." Lambda flitted over to point at one of the circles with a backpack-shaped silhouette, "...to check your inventory. If I'm right, you'll need to do that to summon your weapon without being noticed by the system."

Riku opened the inventory sub-menu, which raised a stack of labeled rectangles. Black Coat (full outfit, [equipped]), Soul Eater (custom enchanted sword, wakizashi type), Potion (3 doses), and one other... "What's this 'Way to Dawn' thing? Aside from my personal philosophy, I mean."

Lambda peeked at that option and made a guess, hoping she was correct. "Judging from the custom icon next to it, you should equip that thing _right now_."

Riku touched the option with his left index finger, causing a flash and a swirl of blue energy around his right hand. He now held what was clearly a Keyblade! The **Way to Dawn** Keyblade took much of its motif from Riku's Soul Eater, but the demonic wing that formed the blade was more triangular and straight than the curved edge of Riku's previous sword. It also had a white angel wing attached to the tip to serve as the Keyblade's teeth, and two more angel wings in white and gray-blue surrounded the handle to form the hand-guard. A chain dangled from the pommel, ending in a Keychain charm shaped like the Heartless Emblem.

Riku gazed at the weapon in wonder. "I almost forgot we got this Keychain in Castle Oblivion... Sorry, just give me a second to let this all catch up with me. I have a Keyblade. I have a _Keyblade!_ " Ah, there came the rush of relief and joy he was expecting. "This is awesome! I finally have a Keyblade!"

Lambda looked closely, with all her Observation protocols active, and came to the unfortunate conclusion that something was just...incomplete about the weapon. "I _hope_ you have a Keyblade, but this might just be another item to ALO. I think it'll work just as well as the real thing while we're here, at minimum. Think of it as a sneak preview, as well as practice for when you get to switch to using this for real."

Riku smirked. "Well, I'm still going to jump for joy all the way to town. If the system running this world thinks I have a Keyblade already, it probably means I _can_ get one eventually. I'll probably get this exact one, and the design is a perfect fit for me. I'm so glad you were right about that all along."

"Yeah. I wish I had a Keyblade. I'll have to make do with Murakumo for the foreseeable future. Not that being 'stuck' with a Nox Nyctores is a downside in any way. It could be better, but that logic applies to everything." Lambda fondly recalled drafting a speech to precede beating down Relius Clover, but she probably couldn't pull it off without a Keyblade of her own.

Riku realized something. "It seems kind of out of place, though. All the legends say the Keyblade tends to appear right in the middle of huge crises, but I don't see a crisis around here, do you?"

"Uh, I think I do." Lambda pointed at a Shadow Heartless that was forming nearby, alongside about a dozen other Heartless of various types. "The system has no records of anything like the Heartless, so I think this is the first time they've shown up here. I'd like to believe they can be deleted as outsiders by the system, but DiZ's computer certainly couldn't do that, nor could it stop them from coming in."

"Well, I'm pretty sure I know what _can_ stop them." Riku smirked as he settled into his favored combat stance, taking note of how it worked with the Keyblade and adjusting his footing to compensate for the slightly greater weight of the weapon's extra parts. "We can't just leave the world like this. I guess I'll have to find the Keyhole, and seal the breach when we leave." Riku took out all the Heartless in this group with even greater ease than usual, but he knew there would be others.

Lambda nodded and flew over to Riku when the battle ended. "It _is_ our fault that they're here. Making a Corridor of Darkness to a new world may not have been the best idea after all."

Riku gasped as he realized the ramifications of his actions. "Shoot, I might as well have rolled out a red carpet and posted directions! I hope I can fix this as fast as Sora usually does."

Lambda held onto Riku's hand with both of hers. "I'll be here, too...sort of. I wish I could help you fight, but like this..."

Riku dismissed the Keyblade, then checked his menu to make sure it was properly back in his inventory. "Don't worry about it, Lambda; I'm not mad at all." Lambda smiled gratefully and flew around behind his head. "I might be jealous if you just found a comfy spot back there to sit in for the rest of our stay, though," Riku called out as Lambda settled into the pocket formed by his Black Coat's hood.

"Whoa, this _is_ pretty comfy! Who would have guessed that those Organization guys walk around with a luxury hammock around their necks?" Lambda kicked her feet over the edge of the hood as she laid on her back.

Riku laughed sarcastically. "Very funny, Lambda. You're the one with the map; where do you think the Keyhole would be?"

Lambda checked with the system to access the maps. "Let's see... I bet it would be at the most important place in the world, so if it's anywhere, it's at the World Tree. We can see it from here, actually, if we go above the trees. Getting there is another matter; it's not very close, and we can't risk using a Dark Corridor and calling the system and the Heartless down on us. The fastest way to get to the center of the continent where it is would be through the cave to the north, since these mountains exceed the altitude limit for flight." Riku didn't move; Lambda could practically feel the disapproval and impatience rolling off him. "Fine, I'll get out of this comfy hammock and lead you there."

Lambda flew out of Riku's hood and waved him over to one end of the clearing, then led him to the mouth of a cave in the side of a cliff. "This leads to a huge underground tunnel network. Since it's the best way to get from this half of the continent to the center, the tunnels are neutral territory, so we hopefully won't have to deal with any players who want to force us out, but be ready for local random monsters. That said, you won't be able to pass for a player, and I doubt you want to repeat the same sentence over and over to fake being an NPC. I hope you have an alibi to keep the world order intact."

Riku nodded. "I've had a lot of time to think one up." With a smirk, he continued, "Then again, nobody seems to bat an eye at Donald or Goofy when they go to all kinds of worlds with Sora. You'd think those guys would stick out more obviously than Sora's giant shoes, but they always get away with saying they're 'just passing through'. Maybe there's some sort of force that prevents locals from recognizing outsiders right away. I can do better than to rely on that, though." He followed the faint glow surrounding Lambda into the cave.

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 _A/N: Here's where the rabid plotbunny that forced me to write this side arc removed its carrot from my throat. If anyone wants to hear the rest, tell me so! I'm pretty sure I can finish this as a mini-series within Blue Skies._


	8. KHO Part 2: What Are We Worried About?

**Blue Skies**

 **Chapter 8: Kingdom Hearts Online, Part 2: What Are We Worried About?**

 _A/N: Let's all say a big thank-you to FierceDeityMask, who agreed to breathe down my neck until I finish this whole side-arc. I also have a few bubbles of inspiration rising up for the next chapter of Silver Linings._

 _There may be a few differences between this and the way the anime worked. The episodes and the wiki can only tell me so much, and I made a few changes for story purposes._

 _To avoid confusion, I've decided this takes place a while before the events of SAO episode 15, during the year that ALO and SAO existed simultaneously. So the parts Kirito should be there for aren't happening yet._

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 _Entering the tunnel maze..._

Riku noticed a problem after walking for about ten feet. "There aren't any light sources in this tunnel. How do people find their way through?"

Lambda listed a few obvious ways, counting them up on her fingers. "Well, there's a Torch item. People planning to go through here generally have a chance to stock up."

Riku sighed. "Too bad those are _other_ people."

Lambda nodded, visible from her own glow in the pitch-black tunnel. "Secondly, there are spells to create light or see in the dark without light."

"There's magic in this game? Wait, 'see in the dark'... I just remembered something..." Riku recalled having to put up with a lot of stress while blindfolded. And to deal with that, he trained himself to... "Good, my dark-sense still works. Navigating these tunnels will be way easier than fighting Roxas with a blindfold on was."

Lambda raised a hand for a high-five, but Riku had to do a sort of finger flick on his part to match Lambda's tiny palm. "Nice thinking, Riku! Luckily, smell is a perfectly valid sense in the game, so there won't be any objections from the system against finding your way around by your nose. By the way, you should probably hear about the magic system."

Riku was beginning to see a pattern here. "Will I be able to trick the system into thinking my spells are local spells?"

Lambda shook her head, causing her long braid to sway back and forth. "Sorry, not this time. The magic in this game is based on a unique language created specifically for ALO, so you cast spells by saying the proper incantations. They can get pretty long, too; it's not like you can just point your Keyblade and yell 'Fire'. Or 'Dark Barrage', for that matter."

Riku winced; half of his combat options just went down the drain. "Ouch. That's probably going to be the biggest restriction on what I can do in here."

Lambda started floating down the tunnel again, signaling that they should walk and talk instead of just standing there. "Well, I suppose if you could figure out the description for your moves and got an opening to say it in the Words of Power, then it would still work. Of course, the monsters would never leave you alone long enough to do that unless you had someone to keep them off you. Stupid half-foot-tall pixie form keeping me from helping..."

Lambda trailed off into nonsensical grumbling, then caught herself and got back on topic. "Luckily, you don't have to call your attacks for physical sword skills, although you _can_ if you think it looks cool - I sure think so. I'm pretty sure you can still do the ordinary version of Maelstrom and any other neat combat moves you have. This game doesn't have a list of sword skills built in, so you're supposed to actually figure out how to fight with a sword while flying. Good thing we spent the last month doing...I'll call it 'applied research' in that field."

Riku went through the motions of his favorite combo without summoning Way to Dawn. "I like that metaphor! I guess I'll be okay in battle, but is there any way I can learn these Words of Power? Just curious."

"There's a full dictionary in your menu for the Words involved in spells, along with a few examples of the basic spells available to all races. You can cast them based on your MP gauge, like any other player. If you want anything better than the absolute basics, though, you have to figure out what phrases work through trial and error." Lambda suddenly stopped moving forwards, and was flattened up against Riku's chest when he kept going. "Oof! My fault, sorry. Speaking of trials, I stopped because there are monsters up ahead. A _lot_ of them."

Riku stopped walking to let Lambda get off his chest. "What kind of monsters are we talking about?"

"I can't be sure because the scanning protocols provided by the system aren't half as good as my own, but I'm pretty sure they're fairly ordinary bats."

As he equipped Way to Dawn, Riku wondered, "Why would I need to worry about a bunch of bats?"

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 _Warning! Fate temptation in progress! Defeat the Bat Swarm, or escape the Tunnels!_

Lambda resisted the urge to scream at Riku, and only managed to stay quiet because her boyfriend seemed to require a lesson about tempting fate. Her grimace slowly morphed into a mischievous smirk as she realized how to deliver that lesson. "Okay, if you're so confident... _HEY!_ CALLING ALL BLOOD-SUCKING BATS IN THIS CAVE! COME OUT AND FIGHT! RIKU SAYS HE'S READY FOR YOU!"

Riku covered his ears at Lambda's sudden, piercing shout, so he almost missed the massive rustling sound of thousands of leathery wings taking flight. This was not merely a "bunch" of bats. This was a colony of airborne rodents numerous enough to suck all the blood out of an entire Frost Giant tribe. Riku's eyes widened in the darkness as his dark-sense picked up the advancing wall of fur, claws, and teeth. Even so, he lashed out with his Keyblade, slaying five bats with every swing.

Unfortunately, at five bats per swing and one or two swings per second, Riku just couldn't kill enough bats to make a difference. Despite his best efforts, the bats invaded his personal space and sunk their tiny fangs into any part of his body they could reach, disregarding his fully-covering Black Coat (due to its lack of any armor bonus). After a few intensely-unpleasant seconds of this assault, Riku finally decided to turn tail and run. Lambda dove into one of the pockets of the dark warrior's coat as he dashed back the way he came like a bat out of hell...or like a boy being chased out of hell by bats.

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 _Outside the Tunnels..._

Riku burst out of the cave, heaving and panting. Thankfully, the bats turned back and left him alone the instant he left the cave mouth. "Ouch..." Riku collapsed against a nearby tree and began checking over his various wounds.

Lambda poked her head out of Riku's pocket. "Now, dear, what did we learn about tempting fate today?"

Riku growled. "I learned that I shouldn't do that, _Mom._ I get that I needed to stop acting overconfident, but did you have to be so mean about it?"

Lambda wore a sympathetic expression, but nodded resolutely. "Yes, I did. That attitude leads to Ansem's...Xehanort's...take on what the Darkness is for, remember? Also, I'm not your _mom_ , I'm your _girlfriend._ As I understand it, I'm fully within my rights as your girlfriend to call you out on your errors when you do something boneheaded, like challenging a swarm of bats to a duel."

Riku winced, feeling thoroughly chastised. "You're right, Lambda. That was pretty boneheaded of me. These bites still hurt like getting a hug from a Morningstar Heartless, though."

Lambda floated up and gave a quick kiss to one of the nastier virtual scars on Riku's stolen Ansem-face, noting that wounds always appeared to glow red in this world. "You're forgiven. If you open your menu, I'll point you to the basic healing spell. That should deal with the damage, but...that's weird. I don't think you should be feeling any pain from damage in this game. The game engine is specifically set to block any sensations of pain. Maybe it has to do with the way our real bodies are merged with our virtual avatars, so the pain barrier doesn't work properly."

Riku opened his menu with a finger swipe. "No use worrying about it; I've dealt with worse pain. Now, where's this healing spell?"

Lambda scrolled the interface and brought up the spell examples, then pointed out the Heal Self spell. "Here it is. Translated, it means something like, _'Heal myself, healing water.'_ You could change the pronoun word to set the range of who it affects, but affecting more people takes a higher skill level in the spell's element, which is water in this case. I'll open another pop-up for the pronunciation guide."

Thusly armed with online research, Riku tried to cast Heal. He fumbled over the words the first time, but the second attempt created a blue glow around him. The red marks faded away, and Riku noticed another pop-up in the corner of his view (which had actually been at the edge of his vision for the entire time he'd been in ALO) that showed his green HP bar growing as his blue MP bar shrank. The spell ended when his HP was fully restored, costing about a quarter of his MP. "Well, awkward pronunciations aside, it's nice to have healing magic of my own for once. I probably owe Mickey dozens of favors by now from all the times he's healed us."

Lambda giggled. "I thought we agreed to stop keeping score back in Castle Oblivion." She sat on Riku's shoulder, and the two rested for a moment in companionable silence. Lambda leaned up against Riku's neck, and accidentally brushed against Ansem's characteristic silver mane. "Wow, this is really soft. From the way it sticks up on top, I thought it would be stiff, but..." The rest of Lambda's sentence was muffled while she buried her face in the silver locks.

Riku blushed crimson, trying and failing to crane his neck away from Lambda. "Hey, Lambda, what are you doing? Is your head on straight?"

Lambda reluctantly released the warm, silver sheets from her tiny fists and stood up on Riku's shoulder. "I think I'm as sane as always, but I might be a little bit less restrained than usual because of the novelty of this whole experience. Everything looks so different at this size! Plus, I doubt I'll get another chance to bury my face this deep in someone's super-soft hair when I get back to my normal height."

Riku relented. "Fine, try whatever you want while you have the chance. Just don't call for attention from monsters again. That hurt my ears before the bats even attacked."

"Acknowledged. Requesting upper limitation to qualifier 'whatever you want.'"

Riku was momentarily distracted by the sudden return of Lambda's protocol-speak. "Um...I guess as long as it doesn't involve getting under my coat or inside my ears or mouth, it'll be fine. Can I order you to speak normally as much as possible?"

"Affirmative."

"Then I hereby order you to keep the protocol-speak to a minimum. And that's all the direct orders I'm going to give you right now."

"Acknowledged. ...Okay, I can talk normally again, at least for now. Please don't feel like you need to watch your wording to dodge around the control protocol, okay, Riku? It's really not a big deal for little things like these, and if you accidentally order something along the lines of 'go jump in a lake', I can ask for confirmation - at which point you can tell me not to do that. Metaphors and programs don't mix, so I'm allowed to make sure." Lambda returned to the "hammock" in Riku's hood.

Riku pondered this info. "I'll be sure to keep that in mind. Whether you trust me or not, though, that protocol still kind of spooks me. I can't afford to mess up when I'm holding some kind of leash on your free will..."

Lambda hummed. "I guess I should probably be more worried about that, but in the end, that's also a part of love, isn't it? You have to hand part of yourself to someone else, and it's scary, but it's worth the risk."

Riku nodded, accidentally bouncing Lambda's hammock. "That makes sense. I never thought of it that way, but then again, I don't think about emotional stuff much. It's too bad we can't just sit here and talk this through."

 **BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB**

 _Random encounter: Heartless!_

As if to prove Riku's point, a group of Heartless rose from the ground and stalked toward the dark warrior. There were five Armored Knights (minor-league enemies that could eventually grow into more powerful Heartless such as the Stalwart Blade), two Assault Riders (centaur-like warriors that spun their huge spears to keep targets at bay), and seven basic Shadows. In a flash, Riku was on his feet, Keyblade in hand. He dove into the battle with a yell, and came back out of it 75 munny richer. "Well, it's apparently time to get back to work. Interesting that I can still get munny here. Let's try this tunnel again; maybe we missed a path?"

 **BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB**

 _Tunnels: Take 2..._

Lambda groaned and slammed her head against the cave wall she'd been examining. "There were signs on the wall the whole time! It even says in big letters, 'WARNING: Bat Swarms! Have wind magic ready!' And here's a sign with an arrow in the other direction that says 'Neutral village ahead: Cave Town, 1/2 mile.' I guess some other players left these here. That's nice of them."

Riku felt a similar pull between his head and the wall. "I feel like an idiot for missing that. Let me guess, 'Spriggans' can't use wind magic?"

Lambda nodded in confirmation. "It would be be more difficult, and only Sylphs can use the highest-level spells. It's odd that you ended up as a Spriggan illusionist when Imps are the dark elementals, but I know you're not _just_ Darkness... Luckily, we don't have to bother the bats if we take this other, well-traveled path, which we _totally missed_ last time." After one final head-slam, Lambda returned to Riku's hood for now.

 **BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB**

 _Cave Town..._

Riku wound up on a large bridge over an underground lake. This cavern chamber was immense enough to house a full-sized lake. Silhouettes occasionally formed on the lake from the powerful aquatic monsters under the surface, which thankfully always stayed underwater. A walled settlement stood on a large island in the center of the lake."So, this is Cave Town? Not a very imaginative name..."

Lambda piped up, "It's a neutral settlement started after the game began, so it was named by the players. I personally prefer the way this town has a functional name that you can easily mention in conversation, instead of some huge, unpronounceable mess translated to Nordic/Faerie." Riku had to concede the point.

Riku approached the town gates. "What can I expect?"

Lambda hummed. "Other than a mix of faerie races, which would mean some actual intelligent life, there isn't much besides some NPCs running shops. We may want to pick up a party member to handle magic while you're on the front lines with the Keyblade, but we'd have to pick out which parts of the truth are okay to tell them."

A red-haired player hailed Riku from atop the wall. "Halt! State your name, affiliation, and intentions!"

"I'm Riku. I'm sort of a freelance wanderer. I'm just passing through while looking for something, but you may want to know about a new bunch of monsters spreading through the world."

"New monsters? I'm interested. Come on in." The gates opened with a loud rumbling sound, and the guard climbed down a ladder to greet the newcomer, which allowed Riku to get a good look at the guard in turn.

He was young-looking, and had short, rust-red hair with a single curl sticking up on top like Lambda's. He wore simple plate armor and had a two-handed broadsword strapped to his back. His eyes were a bright shade of green that stood out next to his hair, but other than that, he seemed very average.

Riku stepped through the gates, which shut behind him. "So, why the chilly welcome?"

The guard bowed his head briefly in apology. "Sorry about that. We've had an uptick in shady characters coming through here, and then we get blamed for letting them through when they raid travelers. So, what are these new monsters?"

Riku took a deep breath. "This is going to sound crazy. They're called the Heartless, and they're invaders from outside the game. I can't guarantee your real body will be safe if you're defeated by one."

This got an immediate, shocked reaction from the guard. His hair curl even stuck straight up, apparently reacting to his emotions. "What?! How is that possible? Will the AmuSphere fry my brain?"

Riku shuddered. "The what? No, it's arguably worse than death by brain frying. If a Heartless kills someone, they take their victim's 'heart', which contains their ability to feel emotion, and that becomes a new Heartless. So basically, if they kill you, you'll turn into one of them, a mindless monster. I'm not sure whether they can do that in virtual reality, but I wouldn't want to test it."

Lambda flew up and confirmed it. "The Heartless don't do much of anything if there aren't any hearts around to steal. Since they're aggressive here, they can indeed steal the hearts of players through their avatars."

The guard was rapidly being overwhelmed by the apparent shift in the way the world(s) worked. "That's crazy... Does that mean my real body will suddenly turn into a monster and attack people in the real world?"

Lambda put on a serious expression, which worked surprisingly well despite her overwhelming cuteness. "That's why everyone has to be careful. I don't think there have been any casualties yet, but we have to keep them from claiming even one person, or the real world won't have much defense against the resulting outbreak. I have pictures of several varieties so people know what to look out for." She raised her hands in front of her, which glowed orange and transferred several image files to the guard's virtual photo album.

The guard saw the download notification in his HUD, and opened his menu to check out the pictures. "Huh, these seem real enough, but they certainly don't look like the typical monsters in ALO. What _are_ you two? She looks like one of those private Pixies from the pre-order raffle, but they aren't supposed to be nearly this intelligent. And you don't exactly look normal either, Riku."

Lambda nodded. "You caught us. We're not a special event, nor are we AIs or normal players. We got into the game from another world, and in doing so accidentally let the Heartless follow us."

Riku facepalmed. "Way to blow our cover, Lambda..."

Lambda shrugged. "What would be the point in hiding it anymore? The players need to know enough to defend themselves, and what we say to the players isn't analyzed the way system commands are. Anyway, I'm Lambda. I had to take the Pixie role when the system found me hacking it - no malicious intent, I swear! I was just trying to learn about the new world! So, what's your name, sir?"

The guard sweatdropped, and his hair curl bent into a question mark. Who could say stuff like that so casually? "Well, if you hacked in from another world, you probably don't know the customs of this one. We don't use our real names. My avatar's name is Meteor; I came up with it when I saw the Salamander race option, and I made up a special move as my namesake. But that's not important. If the Heartless have broken into ALO, how can we stop them?"

Riku spoke up. "That's why we're searching. There should be a thing called a Keyhole in this world; If I can find it, I can use the Keyblade..." Riku equipped Way to Dawn as a demonstration, "...to seal the Keyhole, preventing the Heartless from stealing the heart of the whole world. Then I can seal the Dark Corridor that's letting them invade in the first place. I don't think sealing the Corridor first will work, and no one's ever actually tried to seal a Corridor before, but at least I can keep the world itself safe. The Heartless will ease up attacking people if they can't steal the world's heart."

Meteor didn't seem convinced. "Why do all that when we could just call the admins and let them handle it?"

Lambda shook her head. "The Heartless can't be deleted by security programs - we tried that elsewhere. And if worst came to worst, the admins might simply delete the whole game, which might not even solve the problem, on top of ruining such an awesome world. Right now, the only way the Heartless can invade your real world is by attacking a player's avatar here, but if this world were removed, it's an even chance that the Dark Corridor will either be severed...or fold into your world directly. I don't like those odds. The vigilante method really is our best option."

Meteor mulled over the info, then finally nodded. "Okay, I guess you're right. But do you even know where the Keyhole is? You need to find that to get your plan to work, right?"

Lambda shrugged helplessly. "No, but we have a general idea. The Keyhole is a portal that leads directly to the heart of a world. It'll be in an important place connected to that world's legends. My best guess is that it's at the World Tree."

"That makes sense..." Meteor suddenly perked up. "Hey, do you need a guide to get there? I want to help with this. I won't be dead weight; I'm better than any other Salamander at healing and barrier magic."

Riku considered the offer. "I'd certainly appreciate having someone else handle the magic - the way I usually do it would draw too much attention from the system. But it'll be dangerous. If a Heartless gets you, you won't just log out or have to wait a while; you'll be extinguished, replaced by a monster that will attack your friends and family in the real world. Do you still want to go?"

Meteor nodded resolutely. "I do. I really have nothing better to do, for starters. It's kind of a long story, so bear with me. Salamanders start out being good at fire magic and brute strength, so I put my effort into learning healing alongside that. Why stick to only one good strategy, you know? But it seems the rest of the players in ALO had a different opinion. The other Salamanders scoffed at me for learning 'sissy magic,' and I eventually had to leave the territory altogether to find any opportunities. That got me branded as a 'renegade', which doesn't really mean anything except that other players are bigots." 

The red-haired boy grumbled a bit about virtual discrimination before continuing. "Even here in neutral territory, my so-called renegade status means I don't get many chances to join raid parties or meet new friends, and a solo player can only get so far. I eventually had to settle down as a guard here in Cave Town, logging in only when I'm bored."

Meteor continued his story on a lighter note. "Meeting you was about the luckiest thing I've ever had happen to me, either in the real or virtual world. This could be my chance to do something that really matters. Even if it doesn't turn my avatar's virtual life around, or if no one believes me, I'll be able to think of myself as a hero who was strong enough to save Alfheim, which I could be proud of despite what other player say. And if it turns out I'm not strong enough, that's fine, too. I don't actually _have_ friends or family to endanger in the real world. My parents are big-shots at a technology consulting firm, so they're always traveling, and they let me get into VRMMOs to keep me occupied in an empty house, while they were off attending meetings in other countries to support a company I don't want to inherit."

Riku gazed at Meteor in sympathy. "I certainly understand wanting to explore other worlds out of boredom, and I understand wanting to be a hero. That was basically how I got started. Which is why I'm happy to help you out by taking you along, but I also have to warn you that being a traveling hero didn't turn out at all like I expected. It's not going to be a string of glorious battles and meeting new friends, although that's part of it. You have to be willing to sacrifice anything and everything, and to fight to avoid unnecessary sacrifices. Whether the achievement is worth the pain or not is up to you."

"Then count me in!" Meteor fiddled with his menu to send Riku a party invitation prompt.

Riku touched the green button on the hologram, and Meteor's HP and MP bars appeared below his own. "Good to have you along, Meteor! First, we need to make the news about the Heartless public knowledge."

Meteor opened his Contacts sub-menu. "I've got that covered. There are public billboards you can post on from the menu, and I have a few information brokers from around Cave Town and in Salamander territory in my contacts. They're not expecting a call from me, but they're good enough people to help spread this info around to other territories. Give me a few minutes to send out copies."

A couple minutes of fiddling later, Meteor looked up. "One of my contacts in Salamander territory wants to know what rewards the Heartless drop."

Lambda answered, "Tell him that beating the Heartless wins you another day among the living, but the items they drop have no use in ALO."

Riku blanched. "You mean my munny is totally worthless here?!"

Lambda nodded. "Yeah. ALO uses a currency called Yrd, which you can get by trading items, defeating monsters, or clearing quests. We don't have any Yrd whatsoever, which could be a problem. Of course, we never had much use for our munny, either."

Meteor closed his menu. "Well, at least the fact that the Heartless aren't profitable helped me convince the broker to route the info around for free. I'm ready to go, so let's head northeast to get to the center of Alfheim. The town there is called Alne, it's built on the roots of the World Tree, and it's the largest city in Alfheim. The Keyhole has to be there."

Riku started walking toward the northeast gate and waved his companions after him. "Well, this is a better plan than I usually have. Let's go!"

The party set out for the surface, in high spirits and looking forward to an adventure.

 **BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB**

 _A/N: Meteor is one of my OCs. Originally, he was a Sylph called Zephyr, but this version of the character needs fewer unnecessary changes to the way ALO works._


	9. KHO Part 3: I Can Handle You!

**Blue Skies**

 **Chapter 9: Kingdom Hearts Online Part 3: "I Can Handle You."**

 _A/N: It's been quite a while, hasn't it? Apparently I was presumed dead. Well, here you go. I wonder if this should be in its own story, rather than lumped into Blue Skies? I'll look into it - just as soon as I finish procrastinating..._

 **BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB**

 _On the way out of Cave Town..._

Riku let Meteor lead the way while the party left Cave Town, since their new teammate actually knew the town's layout. Lambda, sitting on Riku's shoulder, spent the time looking around at the people they passed. "There are a lot of different races here. I wonder if I can count them all? Let's see...a pair of Gnomes, three Salamanders, five Imps, another Salamander, one Spriggan - hey, Spriggan, give that sword back to the Gnome! Phew, they caught him... Two Sylphs, another two...no, three Salamanders...I give up."

Riku commented, "It's nice how they all get along, more or less. I have a bad enough reputation without being sort of the same race as that Spriggan, though."

Meteor looked back with a somewhat tense expression. "Don't worry, you look nothing like the other Spriggans. But there are quite a few people staring at us...so maybe worry about that instead?"

Meteor's attention snapped back to his front when a gruff voice called out, "Hey, renegade! I see you found a party. And hey! You joined a whole circus of freaks! Is it 'cuz his girly hair and emo coat match your stupid curl and sissy magic?" A huge, muscular Salamander blocked the path.

Meteor groaned. "Ugh, I was hoping to get out of town without running into this guy again..."

Riku crossed his arms, unimpressed by the bully's insults. "Meteor, care to fill me in?"

"That's what _she_ said!" The bully doubled over from laughing at his own non-joke.

Meteor glared up at his antagonist. "Dude, that joke was old back in the Stone Age." To Riku, he added, "His username is Burly585. He's a bully, an idiot, a failure at comedy, and undeniable living proof that online games shouldn't require everyone to have unique usernames. On the other hand, he has better armor and stronger fire magic than me, so I've never beaten him in a fight."

"Don't worry, that changes today." Riku moved in front of Meteor and put on his best death glare. "So, is there some reason you're blocking the road? We have a matter of life-or-death importance to deal with in Alne, so you have two choices: get out of our way, or be removed."

Burly585 took a step back, clearly unused to dealing with enemies who were taller than him. "Hey, don't act all superior! You want a piece of this?!"

"Here, Riku. This is the legal way to go about showing how 'superior' you are in ALO." Lambda hovered off of Riku's shoulder and opened a tutorial about PvP duels.

With a thankful smile to Lambda, Riku followed the instructions to send the duel invitation. With a smirk, he taunted Burly585. "Well, I'd rather just go about my business, but if you insist..."

The bully quivered in his armored boots; he'd never picked on a target he didn't know he could handle before. And even though Riku was clearly a noob who didn't know how to navigate his menu, the silver-haired man gave off a vibe of danger. No, he could do this! No casual noob could possibly beat the great Burly585! "W-well, fine! Let's go!" He mashed the Accept button, and a pop-up announced the imminent duel to anyone nearby, counting down from 60 seconds to give the combatants time to properly equip themselves.

 **BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB**

 _Riku VS Burly585. 1-on-1 deathmatch. No time limit. Starting in 60 seconds..._

Burly585 took five paces back and equipped a two-handed broadsword, which was proportionally larger and of slightly higher quality than Meteor's weapon. He also equipped a full helmet to protect his face, which slightly muffled his taunt. "Let's see if you can break through my armor, noob! I bet you can't!"

Riku, meanwhile, pulled on his hood and equipped Way to Dawn, settling into his familiar combat stance. He was pleased that deathmatches were allowed, due to the way death worked in ALO. Burly585 would simple dissolve into a red flame for a minute or two, then respawn with some progress lost toward raising his skills. "Challenge accepted."

The bully laughed at the design of Riku's weapon. Granted, it might seem impractical to those who had never seen a Keyblade in action. "What kind of stupid weapon is that?"

Riku let his opponent see the knowing smirk under his hood. "This is the kind of weapon that is _everything_ except stupid. Rather than explain, I'll just show you what I mean."

3...2...1...BEGIN!

Riku charged forward and prepared to jump to the side, knowing that a heavily-armored fighter like Burly585 wouldn't waste energy making the first attack. Or would he? Riku smirked under his hood as he saw the hulking Salamander stomping right at him, sword raised high overhead, yelling, "HIYAAAH!"

Burly585 probably thought he was intimidating, but he might as well have painted a big red stripe across his torso to tell his opponent where his guard was open. In an extra burst of speed, Riku painted that stripe for him. "Zantetsuken!"

"What the h-URK!" Burly585 didn't even have a chance to comment on the attack before his torso slid off of his cleanly-disconnected legs. Both halves of the bully caught on brilliant red fire and burned away, leaving behind a small red fireball that hovered for a few seconds before puffing out entirely.

The duel pop-up announced the winner: Riku!

The fight, though laughably short, had attracted a few onlookers, many of whom applauded Riku's display of speed and strength. Riku rubbed the back of his head through his hood, feeling out of place. This felt like the old days of Riku being the best fighter on the Destiny Islands, but he couldn't shake the feeling that he didn't deserve this applause. He hadn't finished atoning for the messes he'd made yet. Besides, the whole point of the duel was to clear the path, and now there was a crowd taking up the whole road.

Lambda noticed the problem. Flying overhead, she called out, "Riku's pretty cool, isn't he? We really do have to get moving, though, so clear the road, please!" The people did move aside, but mostly to get a closer look at Lambda, who suddenly realized that most Pixies were relatively simple AI programs. "And now I'm the big attraction...great..." One of the awed onlookers suddenly grabbed Lambda's wing, which she had to yank out of his grip. "Hey, hands off! Let us through, please!"

Meteor stepped forward. "Let me handle this." He raised a hand in front of him and spoke several words of an incantation, surrounding Riku, Lambda, and himself in shining blue barriers that could push away solid objects. "Just plow through them! Follow me!" He sprinted through the crowd, tossing aside an Imp and Sylph who were too slow to get out of the way. Riku followed suit, while Lambda grabbed onto his hood, merging her barrier with his.

 **BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB  
**

 _Cave Town: North Gate..._

At the edge of town, the party slowed down to catch their breath. Their barriers faded as Meteor's spell timed out.

Lambda huffed in irritation as she pulled herself all the way into Riku's hood. "That guy's hands were grimy! I didn't know immaterial wings like these could even feel contact, much less transmit a sensation as complex as uncleanliness. Well, I guess that's what I get for trying to be polite to a mob. Thanks for the save, Meteor!"

Meteor gave her a thumbs-up. "It was no trouble! I'm just glad my barrier spell is useful for something. I haven't exactly had much success using it in combat, even if that's mostly because I never had a party to support."

Riku grimaced. "If that Burger858 guy was anything like the rest of his race, then no wonder you had to leave the Salamander territory. I personally don't see what's so great about specializing in attacking magic. Sure, I mostly use offensive magic myself, but one of these days I'm going to take a nasty hit from something, and I won't be able to heal myself."

Lambda added, "He also seemed to be teasing you about your hair, Meteor. I noticed that curl changes shape sometimes; is that why?"

Meteor chuckled grimly. "Yep. It's a super-rare feature I got in the avatar randomization process, and it responds to my emotions. You'd think having a rare avatar would be great, but it's almost impossible to lie for whatever reason when my hair goes rigid from stress. Not only that, but it's a _female-only_ feature. I only got it due to a randomly-occurring glitch that was patched a month after I joined."

Riku winced. "Wow, that is some seriously bad luck."

"Tell me about it. Everyone who doesn't tease me for specializing in defense seems to think I'm a magical girl wannabe. I've tried cutting the dumb thing off, but it reappears whenever I return from logging out."

Lambda realized that she had a similar hair curl, and also matched many traits of a character in the magical girl fantasy genre, so she felt the need to speak up. "I, for one, protest the notion that magical girls are somehow inferior to musclebound bullies like Burly585."

Riku remarked as an aside, "Oh, yeah, that was his name. Now I can forget about him all over again."

Meteor grumbled, "It's not so much the 'magical' part I have the problem with. It gets really old, walking into shops and hearing the clerk ask me, 'Can I help you, miss?' The glitch even makes NPCs do that. That's part of why I carry a big sword."

Riku cut in, asking, "What's the rest of the reason? You said earlier that you named a unique move after yourself. What sort of move is it?"

Meteor cheered up immediately, walking faster as the party approached a stream of daylight at the end of the tunnel. "I'll show you the next time we run into some monsters. Don't worry, it won't take long. The random encounter rate on the road right outside the caves is..."

 **BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB  
**

 _Random encounter: goblins and Heartless!_

"...Really high." Meteor sighed and drew his sword, pointing it at one of the five Shadows crawling between the legs of seven goblins, which had appeared in a blue flash that doubled as ALO's teleportation effect. "Those are Heartless, right? Time to see if in-game weapons can beat them."

Setting his shoulders in a firm line, Meteor activated his red Salamander wings. With a mighty leap, he soared high above the group of enemies and was silhouetted by the sun. While he was in the air, he quickly chanted a few Words of Power, covering his broadsword in a cloak of fire as he raised it overhead.

"Meteor Crush!" Meteor shouted his namesake attack and dove straight down into the fray, flaming sword-first. A massive explosion went off as he crashed to the ground, knocking all the enemies into the air. The Shadows immediately burst into puffs of Darkness that scattered on the hot wind, but the goblins kept sailing through the air, making them easy prey for Meteor as he spun in a circle, throwing the rest of the flames off his sword with a spinning slash. The extra fire washed outward and incinerated all the goblins. Meteor stood back up in the middle of the now-burning field and slung his sword onto his back again, unfazed by the flames slowly dying down around him.

For a moment, there was only silence. Then, Riku and Lambda erupted into applause.

Riku gave Meteor a big thumbs-up. "That was the most badass attack I've seen in months! And that's a really big compliment, since I'm comparing you to Organization XIII."

Lambda dug through functions and found a battle-victory fanfare jingle to play for Meteor. "What style! Even Riku's attacks aren't usually that cool, and his are usually limited to a single target, so yours is more useful, too!"

Meteor basked in the compliments he really wanted to hear, but finally held up a hand. "I know my Meteor Crush is a cool move; I'm the one who invented it, after all. But there's a huge drawback. See my sword?" He turned around to show his new friends that his broadsword was glowing red-hot. "I only have an ordinary metal sword. Covering it in such hot flames weakens the metal. I went through a lot of broadswords before I figured out that I have to not use my sword at all for a little more than five minutes after that attack, or it'll break."

Riku's applause lost some steam; five minutes of being unable to attack was quite a steep price to use such an awesome move. "Ouch. That must have been embarrassing the first time it happened."

Lambda found a sound clip titled "sadairhorns" and played it. She winced at how fitting the fanfare turned out to be, and hid in Riku's pocket in embarrassment.

Meteor grimaced. "The cooldown time is why I had so much trouble with that bully; if anyone survives my Meteor Crush, I get left totally defenseless. That's why I really need to be in a party. So again, thanks for bringing me along! I hope my Meteor Crush and support magic makes up for my below-average swordplay and weird hair."

Riku arched an eyebrow. "Let's tally the weirdness between us. You, Meteor, have a curl of hair that bends when you emote. Meanwhile, I, Riku, am the living prison of a sentient Heartless supervillain. My idea of a vacation is to set out and explore other worlds. I'm trying to prove myself worthy of my sword-sized key's approval. And to top it all off, this is my girlfriend." Riku plucked Lambda out of his pocket by her cape's collar, eliciting an adorable little _eep_ from the Murakumo Unit-turned-Pixie. "I think I can handle you. Right, Lambda?"

Lambda was still flustered over being suddenly yanked into the air, but she gave Meteor a double thumbs-up. "Yeah, we both pretty much think 'weird' is cool! Now could you let go of my collar, dear?"

"Sure thing, dear." Riku dropped Lambda into his other hand, and she fluttered back into the air. Both of them were still flushed from the sheer cuteness of that squeak.

Meteor started laughing at nothing in particular. At first he just chuckled softly, but as he got louder, Riku and Lambda joined in until they were all laughing together. They were the friends Meteor had always wanted. "Seriously, though, thank you both so much. I won't put myself down anymore."

Lambda clutched her sides as she tried to get her giggles under control. "No worries. That was the best laugh I've ever had, and it's great to be able to laugh like this with the least bigoted Salamander in ALO." Riku, who was still letting out chuckles every few seconds, nodded in agreement.

Meteor wiped a few tears out of his eyes, then turned toward the World Tree's silhouette on the horizon. "You're both welcome. We're going to need to fly to get to Alne before sundown, when I'll have to log out for a while. I hope you can keep up!" With a smirk, Meteor extended his wings and took off, racing toward Alne as fast as his wings could carry him.

Riku returned an equal smirk as he overtook Meteor's speed with the Power of Darkness. "Don't worry about me." Both of them poured on the speed, and Lambda laughed brightly as she held onto Riku's hood.

To the hordes of Heartless already roaming on the ground, the travelers looked like shining streaks of red, black, and white racing through the sky, taunting the creatures below with the delicious Light of their hearts. Claws of Darkness stretched skyward, yearning to tear the three friends' camaraderie apart, but there was a much tastier Light further ahead. The Heartless lacked the advanced minds necessary to truly plan ahead, but their feral instincts knew what to do. They would stalk, track, and devour, always and forever...


End file.
